Philly Fringe 2024: Real Life Brothers presents Is This a Wedding?

Many modern couples agonize over their wedding day, from how to dress to the astronomical cost. Hyde Pascale and Clemente brought the meta-anxieties from the specific activities of the ceremony to the concepts of marriage in general. Especially for a queer couple in an interracial relationship, the choice to get married (and to even have a wedding) is fraught with cultural politics. They noted that their legal right to get married in this country is only possible due to two recent Supreme Court cases—and both cases weren’t concerned with marriage as an act of love but as political and economic forces.

White dresses, first dances, and queer consummations

With video projections of Hyde Pascale as dramaturg, the couple made their way through a quick-and-dirty thematic overview of Western European/American marriage and traditions. What does it mean to wear a white dress today versus the red or blue dresses of times past? Why do couples spend so much time and money learning to perform a first dance, something of a bygone era when dances were strong social activities? Where does religion and money fit into all this? And how does queer sex complicate the original intentions of consummating a marriage? Blending dry history lectures with humorous moments, this wedding ceremony-turned-presentation provided insight into the marital debate.

A nonbinary ceremony

Where Hyde Pascale wielded her scholarship, Clemente brought forth personal explorations of identity. I found it most heartfelt when Clemente (who is non-binary and uses it/they/he pronouns) stepped forward to share its anxieties, both historical and personal. While Hyde Pascale is credited in the program as Bride, Clemente is credited by a series of question marks—the couple couldn’t find a word in the English language for Clemente’s role. Its interludes tackled everything from the fetishization of Asian women as mail-order brides within the United States to eating disorders and the choice of food and celebration to baring themselves onstage in choosing an outfit. Clemente used its wedding-as-performance to unpack how it chooses (and does not get to choose) how it shows up within this relationship and marriage.

A one-time ritual

I admit, it’s hard to review someone’s actual wedding: performers being nervous might detract from a show, but it’s normal for a wedding ceremony. But I dutifully sat next to an “assigned” bridesmaid and the father of the bride, was served my plate of fish (stickers), clapped at their unique spin on a classic first dance song, and laughed/cried/celebrated alongside the other celebrants when the officiant stepped forward to sign their license.

This was a one-night-only event—you can always get married again, but I think a ritual like this can only happen once. It seems absolutely true to these two performers, who have dedicated themselves to every aspect of theater production, to use this opportunity to celebrate their artistic careers and each other. Congratulations to the happy couple on starting their married life, and may their wedding be one of many wonderful productions together!

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