Underbite Theatre’s ‘Would You Still Love Me, IF?’

The “IFs” in John S. Anastasi’s drama are bigger than what most couples face. A standard “Yes, of course, dear” works for “Would you love me if I gained 100 pounds?” or “Would you love me if I was bald?” But what if a partner wants to change gender?

That’s the big question posed by the relationship between lawyer Danya (Austin Stanton), a woman who wants to be a man, and novelist Addison (Samantha Parry), her devoted partner. They want to adopt a child, but this could change everything.

Also featured in Shelli Pentimall Bookler’s brisk staging are Danya’s mother Victoria (Judy Knoop) and the hotshot surgeon who might transform Danya to Danny, Dr. Gerard (Heather Plank).

The questions not asked

Unfortunately, the play is hampered by questions not asked and conversations avoided. At the play’s onset, both partners have been withholding information: Danya has never told Addison that she’s wanted to be a boy all her life (she also doesn’t dress or act like a male, which makes surgery a huge leap that Dr. Gerard rightfully discourages), and Addison has arranged an adoption with a pregnant teen without including Danya. The play wants us to accept that they’re passionately in love and deeply committed, but this is Bad Relationship 101.

The real question is, “Would you still love me if I kept huge secrets that would upend and possibly destroy your life?” I think we all know our answer.

These secrets come at a cost: not only the broken trust, but also the convoluted logic of Anastasi’s play, which acknowledges that transitioning involves huge steps but allows Danya to skip most of them and head right to surgery. Anastasi also allows Dr. Gerard to bypass confidentiality and reveal the situation to Victoria, which explodes everything — as perhaps the couple deserves, since this relationship is teetering on lies anyway.

Does love conquer all?

The cast play all this straight — no pun intended — even groaner lines like, “She had the balls you so desperately want” and “A penis does not make a man.” It’s too bad, because the issues are fascinating. Eventually, the script requires jumps of a year, then six months, and then five years to reach a conclusion built on coincidence and contrivance that doesn’t ring true, despite Stanton and Parry’s sincerity. The script also doesn’t allow enough time for the necessary transformations that take place in those gaps, though the director makes a resourceful effort.

For all the battling in Would You Still Love Me, IF?, there’s also a lot of love. It doesn’t solve the script’s shortcomings, but the characters’ passions, played genuinely by a brave cast, make the production well worth seeing. The biggest “if” here is really the one that drives so many stories: What would I do?